Since Rod has been gone i have been clenching my jaw. Clenching when asleep, driving, cleaning, breathing. So pretty much all the time. I have to constantly remind myself to release. All this tension has given me a headache the size of Texas that has not given up. I have been working through the aches & going on with daily chores, Christmas preparations, kids schedules. But yesterday I needed to stop. So I let myself. I wasn't sure about skipping all Tuesday afternoon activities so I said a little prayer that heavenly Father would give me the strength to get through the late night or to give me the peace to take a break. I always feel guilty when I miss something scheduled. I am nutty. Funny part is the very 1st thing Maddox said to me when I picked the children up from school was "Mom I am really tired. Can we take a rest tonight." Okay! Yup. I hear ya! Answered prayer. So we did. We went home put on pajama pants & watched Studio C via YouTube, played Lego's & cars & babies. I made an easy dinner & we had nice long hot tubs. The children played so well together & I just knew that this night off was needed! My headache has stopped being so intense & the relief has been a huge blessing. I am so glad our little Maddox is so in tune with the spirit. He always has been. He is so busy & loud & furious, but somehow his little heart hears what others do not. The break last night helped me prepare for a happy & productive day of Christmas shopping with the littles before dressing the kids up for the USO Christmas dinner. There was some really sweet patriotic & Christmas songs sang by the USO entertainment corp. The patriotic songs made me cry. I kept my eye on T to make sure he was holding strong. The kids loved it! Cooper danced & Presley yelled "I see their panties mommy!" as the singers danced in their cute little performance numbers. which were tasteful, just short. i about died. & Then...the male in the corp came down into the crowd & was walking around. Presley climbed up on her chair & started waving & batting her eyes...so he came over & serenaded our girlie. she was so excited! She kept saying "He sang to me mommy!" After the musical show we ate from the buffet. Britt was thrilled to have ham. He loves ham! Then came the high light of the night! The children were invited to sit with Santa & then his elves handed the children a gift for each of them. Santa had asked us before hand to pick a gift up to $50 per child for the event. & Santa came through! Each received a gift that suited them well. Presley went bananas over her baby. She has wanted one forever & ever, but we have been hesitant because a doll that potties?! but its the one thing she has talked & talked about. Tre convinced me to let him read hunger games. again..hesitation, but we agreed that he could as long as he talked to me if he felt uneasy. He has loved the 1st book so Santa brought him the next 2. We shared this night with some sweet friends! Maria & Kristen both have husbands where Rod is & they are medical as well, but they are on a different MFST team then Rod. They are a few months further into this adventure so I really look up to them! They are strong & find happiness through the time apart. We were a sight to see with 13 kids between the 3 of us. I was really overwhelmed in the nights festivities because Coop had a melt down & the keeping track of 5 kids is always an adventure. But when I walked out of the event I was hit with perspective & gratitude. There were so many volunteers that wanted to help & who did things like watch kids, help serve food, set up, clean up, shop, cook, perform, organize, decorate...It was a 5 star event & gifts for all those babies with moms & dads overseas...what a huge undertaking! & What a wonderful thing to do for children who have to celebrate Christmas with out a parent. I am so grateful for the USO, & for the Gary Sinise foundation. The little boys went to bed with big smiles on their faces & new toys in their arms...& Presley, well I have had to change her shirt 3 times from baby alive. Having children is just too funny & wonderful. Christmas through their eyes is magical.
